Growing Up in the 1980s

Some things to bring a smile to the faces of late 20 and 30-somethings, you know you grew up in the 80s if:

1. You've ever ended a sentence with the word SIKE

2. You watched the Pound Puppies

3. You can sing the rap to the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and can do the Carlton Dance

4. Girls wore biker shorts under their skirts and felt stylishly sexy

5. You yearned to be a member of the Baby-sitters club and tried to start a club of your own.

6. You owned those lil' Strawberry Shortcake pals scented dolls

7. You know that "WOAH" comes from Joey on Blossom

8. Two words: Hammer Pants

9. If you ever watched "Fraggle Rock"

10. You had plastic streamers on your handle bars... and spokey-dokes or playing cards on your spokes for that incredible sound effect

11. You can sing the entire theme song to "Duck Tales" (Woo ooh!)

12. It was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons

13. You wore a ponytail on the side of your head

14. You saw the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on the big screen...and still know the turtles names

15. You got super-excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school

16. You made your mom buy one of those clips that would hold your shirt in a knot on the side

17. You played the game "MASH" (Mansion, Apartment, Shelter, House)

18. You wore stonewashed Jordache jean jackets and were proud of it

19. L.A. Gear....need I say more?

20. You wanted to change your name to "JEM" in Kindergarten. (She's Truly Outrageous.)

21. You remember reading Tales of a fourth grade nothing and all The Ramona books

22. You know the profound meaning of "WAX ON, WAX OFF"

23. You wanted to be a Goonie

24. You ever wore fluorescent neon clothing (some of us...head-to-toe)

25. You can remember what Michael Jackson looked like before his nose fell off and his cheeks shifted

26. You have ever pondered why Smurfette was the only female smurf

27. You took lunch boxes to school...and traded Garbage Pailkids in the schoolyard

28. You remember the CRAZE, then the BANNING of slap bracelets

29. You still get the urge to say "NOT" after every sentence

30. You remember Hypercolor t-shirts

31. Barbie and the Rockers was your favorite band

32. You thought She-ra (Princess of Power!) and He-Man should hook up.

33. You thought your childhood friends would never leave because you exchanged handmade friendship bracelets.

34. You ever owned a pair of Jelly shoes.

35. After you saw Pee-Wee's Big Adventure you kept saying "I know you are, but what am I?"

36. You remember "I've fallen and I can't get up"

37. You remember going to the skating rink before there were inline skates.

38. You ever got seriously injured on a Slip and Slide.

39. You have ever played with a Skip-It.

40. You had or attended a birthday party at McDonalds.

41. You've gone through this nodding your head in agreement.

42. You remember Popples

43. Don't worry, be happy

44. You wore like, EIGHT pairs of socks over tights with high top Reeboks.

45. You wore socks scrunched down (and sometimes still do..getting yelled at by younger hip members of the family)

46. You remember boom boxes and walking around with one on your shoulder like you were all that.

47. You remember watching both Gremlins movies.

48. You know what it meant to say "Care Bear Stare!!"

49. You remember watching Rainbow Bright and & My Little Pony Tales

50. You thought Doogie Howser/Samantha Micelli was hot

51. You remember Alf, the lil furry brown alien from Melmac

52. You remember New Kids on the Block when they were cool...and don't even flinch when people refer to them as "NKOTB"

53. You knew all the characters names and their life stories on "Saved By The Bell," The ORIGINAL class

54. You know all the words to Bon Jovi - > YOU GIVE LOVE A BAD NAME

55. You just sang those words to yourself

56. You remember watching Magic vs. Bird

57. Homemade Levi shorts.. (the shorter the better)

58. You remember when mullets were cool!

59. You had a mullet!

60. You still sing "We are the World"

61. You tight rolled (pegged) your jeans

62. You owned a banana clip

63. You remember "Where's the Beef?"

64. You used to (and probably still do) say "What you talkin' 'bout Willis?

65. You had big hair and you knew how to use it

66. You're still singing shot through the heart in your head, aren't you!

American Conservatism in the Twenty-First Century

Here are some things that I think the GOP need to work on, if they stand a chance in the twenty-first century. They aren't really guidelines, just some thoughts running through my head.

Reagan. Possibly the most charismatic president that ever graced the Oval Office. The man who was told, at 72, that he was too old to run for presidential office. Some laughed at the fact he was an actor. This man won two landslide elections (one versus an incumbent). He took the thought of "Compassionate Conservatism" (birthed by Barry Goldwater) and took it to the next level. Not to mention the fact that this man ended the Cold War. He didn't do it by sanctions, nor did he use ass kissing. He looked Gorby in the face and said, "Tear down this wall!" To look a fascist regime in the face, with the nuclear buzzer constantly at 23:59:59, and tell them (in a Moses sense) "let your people go!". That's being a true leader of the free world.

It is this form of diplomacy that the Republican Party has lost. It is what won in 1980, 1984, 1988, and brought in a Republican lead congress in 1994. Somewhere during the early 2000's it was lost. This is why they lost big in 2006, and lost huge in the presidential election of 2008. 

Reagan (and to a point Gingrich) had the love of the people. It seemed as though they were approachable, like you could possibly have a beer with them. This is why Pat Buchanon has lost every bid he has put in for the nomination, Bob Dole lost in 1996, and why McCain lost in 2008. I like the way Buchanon thinks, but I honestly don't think that I could watch the Superbowl with any of these men. Obama won for the same reason Clinton won in 1992 and 1996: constituents thought that they could either enjoy a cookout with these men, or share a joint with them.

The GOP needs to fall back to what worked for them in the latter part of the twentieth century. The people cry for change, but maybe they'd fair better with a little bit of regression.